Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Octuplets: Nadya on Dr Phil (Part 3 - meets octuplets)

March 11, 2009

(3-10) Octuplets: Updated list of posts

Second day. Dr Phil meets the babies for the first time.

(Pix) Look at Jonah. What do you think the chances are of him developing normally - without any physical or neurological deficits?

From the website:

Dr. Phil meets Nadya Suleman’s octuplets. He and Nadya visit the babies in the hospital, where they have spent the first six weeks of their lives. The Dr. Phil show makes every effort to follow proper hospital procedure, and to ensure that the babies are not exposed to any germs or health dangers. As they approach the area where the babies reside,

DR PHIL: I understand the news is good on all fronts.

NADYA: They’re so healthy. They’re doing great. Six of them are bottle-feeding completely.

The two scrub in as if they’re doctors entering the operating room, although Dr. Phil is not allowed to touch the babies. He meets Noah, the first baby to be born, and the only baby with blond hair.

DR PHIL: He’s so perfect in every feature.

He then meets Maliyah, who weighs close to four pounds; Isaiah, the largest baby and the first who will come home; Nariyah, who opens her eyes and looks around; Makai, the baby Nadya didn’t know she was carrying; Jeremiah, who weighs around three pounds, and Josiah, who weighs two-and-a-half pounds.

DR PHIL: They are incredibly sweet and beautiful babies.

NADYA: They all breathe really well on their own. To me, they look bigger every day.

DR PHIL: They look tiny to me.

Four of the babies are ready to come home, but Nadya will only bring home two at a time so she can get settled with them, and then add the others two at a time.

The preemie they show has his hands up parallel to his face like you seen on ultrasound in utero. It’s very creepy and somewhat amphibian. Normally an infant makes fists. Linda West-Conforti of *Angels in Waiting* says it’s a physiologically sign of stress. Nadya had no idea.

And NADYA, ever delusional: They’re not medically fragile.

Back at the studio:

Dr. Phil asks Nadya for her thoughts after watching video of their visit to the hospital.

NADYA: I completely get lost in their faces. I have such love for them.

DR PHIL: Four of the babies are about to come home, but they’re not ready to release them until you demonstrate certain criteria.

NADYA: They know what’s in progress.

DR PHIL: It’s got to be getting real that you’re about to be home with 14 children. What are you thinking as you think about that, and you see these babies?

NADYA: I would be utterly overwhelmed if there was no support network. But there’s a support system in place, so I feel almost at ease.

She feels almost at ease? A mother facing 64 feedings/day just for the octuplets? What reality does this woman inhabit? She should be frightened out her mind - in a maternal responsibility way. She should be doubting her abilities. Instead she’s Polly Anna. No one but the paid staff will she be able to count on 100%. Her mother is already sleeping at a friend’s house because of the noise at night.

Nadya has made arrangements with AngelsInWaitingUSA.org, a non-profit organization that will provide 24-hour care for all 14 of her children.

DR PHIL: Is there a health concern among any of the eight right now?

NADYA: Only the smallest, Jonah, and he’s just small. They need him to grow.

DR PHIL: Your next challenge is not only setting up the house, the manpower, the proper care, but folding these eight in with these six and making it work.

Nadya says she’s going to do her best to make sure her six older children don’t feel left out.

Honestly, how in the hell is she going to do that? The oldest daughter, 6, already said she doesn’t want them because the “crying is gonna stress out” her mother. What is her life going to be like? She is going to be a caretaker - she already has been tall her life to her neurologically impaired siblings. It’s unfair. Her childhood is over and the rest of her life will be defined by those octuplets and her “stressed out mom”.

How much time will she have to herself and how much time will be spent “Honey, can you do this…do that…you’re healthy…you’re momma’s big helper? I don’t see how anyone thinks this is ok. Why should one child be sacrificed for the selfishness of the mother? She has already neglected their needs and there is no catching up with premature octuplets at home. A 6 y/o child able to predict what is going to happen to her mother shows it has happened time and time again for her to recognize a pattern. Very, very sad.

I know what goes on in a double digit family and the older ones are never free of responsibility. And they end up raising* the younger ones - even in the most functional home. I don’t know how much more I can convey my absolute anger at this woman. No mother - no sane person - would make the selfish decisions she has made - is continuing to make.

What more did anyone need after she refused free comprehensive care by trained professionals 24/7 for all 14 of her children?

Who can possibly believe her when she says: Everything I do will be for my children?

And her forst decision? Her first instinct? Was clearly not in the best interest of her children.

How is she suddenly supposed to develop this? Especially under the stress of 64 feedings/day and 32 or so diaper changes?

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